Getting Jazzed Times 2

Yesterday I wrote about how Becca Levie got me pretty jazzed by talking with me about a couple of books and suggestions for the help I was seeking.  Today I am jazzed times 2!  Finished reading chapter 1 of Outwitting the Devil and I was having revelations in just a matter of a few pages.

I've often (jokingly) accused Kirk Weisler of writing in his T4D blog (http://kirkweisler.com/t4d/) write to me because he keeps hitting me right between the eyes with his words of wisdom.  I think Napoleon Hill hit me with a sledge hammer!  How did he know so much about me back in the early 1900's.  I am amazes, jazzed, inspired and already seeing a new beginning, and I've only read chapter 1.  Thank you!  You're going to have to read it yourself to understand. You'll have to walk in similar shoes to really understand.

My mind has been so full of thoughts tonight I have almost jumped from one end of the stick to the opposite end without even thinking.  That does not really compute since I am a believer that most everything that goes on happens squarely between our ears...  in our mind.  When the mind is lost and full of indecision, things just don't work very well.  We can't make rational, logical decisions.  We don't behave and act in a manner that traditionally has been normal for us.  We begin doing the things we would normally not care for in others.  I have been stuck in that mould for several months...  maybe several years.  I knew it, I didn't like it and I knew it had to chance...  I just just didn't know how.  That has changed.

Dr. Hill wrote "My reasoning faculty had almost been paralyzed".  As Sharon Lechter annotated, I have felt discouraged and irritable and it became debilitating to me at work, at home and in all I did.  I was not me. I now know why and am focused on a path of change.  First returning to the old Dan, then continuing to get better in every way, every day.

Outwitting the Devil....

I never heard of the book Outwitting the Devil, by Napolean Hill, until tonight.  Thank you so much Becca Levie (http://www.beccalevie.com/), you're the best!

Today...  no, tonight, is the start of a new direction.  I may have said it before, but tonight, December 22, 2011, I move forward with a new vision...  a new desire....  with new purpose.  Take note of that.  I no longer want to be blue...  be down...  be overwhelmed.  I need to put on a smile from within, not just a surface smile.  It serves no purpose to be a prisoner of life.  Becca gave me a gift tonight...  words that had been given to her before, shared with me tonight....

 "Our capacity to feel joy, peace and happiness is in direct proportion to the depth of pain and sorrow we experience. Knowing this during dark times gives us a reason to put one step in front of another until we once again find joy and back to a place of great joy and hope."


me with Les Brown, April 2011

 This all started during a conversation with Becca as she shared about a book she was finishing reading by Les Brown.  Les is an incredible rags to riches inspiration to all of us that we can reach our own level of greatness.  The cool part is that I have also personally spoken with Les about his story and rise to to national prominence by telling his story.  Telling his story, that's what Kirk Weisler (http://www.kirkweisler.com/) and Phil Gerbyshak (http://www.philgerbyshak.com/) saying to me.  So, what does this all have to do with the title So, what about Outwitting the Devil?  Becca turned me onto this book written by Napolean Hill (author of Think and Grow Rich).  She tells of how he felt like a psuedo leader when he faced a time of such fear and paralizsis (as I feel now) and he didn't believe he could continue (hmm, I know that feeling too). He thought all hope was lost and he couldn't leave his brother-in- laws basement snd he became cruel and a burden. He progressed past that and became one of the greateat teachers of all time.  Such inspiration!

As in coaching, when things get tough, I always said, back to basics.  Thank you tongiht Becca and for many times past, Kirk, Phil and others, for your positive suggestions.  Here we go, one step at a time.

A Short Visit With My Dad...

I was able to get up to Boscawen, NH today to make a short visit with my dad, I really needed some fatherly wisdom and time with him.  It is days and weeks like this that I miss him so.  It's not that we would often sit down and have heart to heart talks... I just looked up to him to help me figure out what I needed to do.  Sometimes the answers might not have been perfect for everyone, but they were perfect for me.  My dad was occasionally a man wiser than his actions, but he always had the best intent.  So do I.

I'm so sad I can't fix what's wrong...  at least to the liking of others.  If I don't fix things, I feel like I'm living in a world of discontent and hearing about how messed up things are.  If I work on fixing things I feel like everyone needs to tell me "there way" rather than support me in my efforts, making it just as bad, if not worse.  I'm between a rock and a hard spot....  I'm like a dog chasing his tail....  I'm overwhelmed and wont it to be better.  How do I get there.

I didn't need to ask Dad, I know the answers... I went there to confide in him and for acceptance and support without reservation of complaint.  I knew he would help without judging.  I knew he would be there no matter what.  I had no where else to turn.

On a side note, until I saw this picture, I didn't know I looked as old and aged as I do.  Guess I'm glad I don't have to look at me...  I'm beginning to look how I feel
.
After thought:   One of my Facebook friends just posted ‎"Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes and move on"  While I like that, I'd love to be able to move on with those around me rather than have to create a whole new circle of friends...  is it worth the effort or best just to forgive and forget those that can't forgive and forget without continued drama?  That post was followed with ""Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that ? We must have perseverance and, above all, confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained."  There is lots of good advice out there, I should just heed what I already know.

Sometimes you just can't get started...

Maybe I get involved in too many things.  Perhaps it just frustrates me to see things "not done right" (at least as I see them) that sucks me into more things than I really want to be involved in.  What ever the cause, I'm normally up to my eyes with alligators, then it is nearly impossible for me to even get started.  Ouch.

I can do most all that needs to be done, that's not really the problem.  It's figuring out where to start.  On one hand, it could be a simple task (which is the route I'll likely have to take) to just make a list and start working on it.  Note I left out the word prioritize.  Is that smart or just delaying more disaster?  I don't think it is as simple as prioritizing the sequence of things you do in the morning....  going to the bathroom just must come before having breakfast.

My struggles are because I have allowed so many things to accumulate, there are too many number 1 priorities.  What then?  If I revert to the method of just working on the list...  it seems one of the ugly number 1 priorities sticks it's ugly head up and says "hey, what about me?"  You stop what your are doing and begin working on the ugly...  then ugly number 2 pops up and the vicious circle has begun.  Ugh.

So I need some help.  I can work on the list, generally grouped in priorities, but knowing you can not work on all the number 1's at once, some of the ugly's will pop up.  Do I say oh well, wait your turn?  Do I celebrate the small steps of getting them done, one by one and be happy for that?  I can survive the ugly's, as long as they don't get too ugly.  It's the people that are reminding me about the ugly's that stresses me to a point of inaction.  That's where I need the help and suggestions.  How do I deal with the disappoint I have caused and apparently continue to cause?

Help!

Not all things are bad... enter Nicholas

I guess at times, I may tend to rant and rave in this blog space.  Not this time.  Regardless of how bad things may seem at time, there is always good.  Enter Nicholas.  Nicholas James Ballinger, he entered the world on November 28th at  8lbs 6oz and 21 inches long!! What a big boy!

Congratulations to my daughter and son-in-law, proud new parents....  and a proud new big sister too!

Mom and Dad were signing papers for their new house while still in the hospital.  Uncle Ryan already has planned on giving skating lessons (and teaching checking too even though he didn't mention that part).  He's a pretty cute kid... I like the pose... I am thinking I see the resemblance to me...  especially the blonde hair.

No matter what else, this is a good thing.  Welcome my first grandson!

You are "be-YOU-tiful" and You Do Make a Difference

I have always stived to be a person that made a difference.  I think there was a time when I was somewhat successful in doing that.  Lately, I'm not so sure.  The interesting thing is that I know the problem is with me, I feel it, know it, and perhaps have been internalizing what I tell people not to do...  I've made internal excuses.  I know change is necessary.

At the 2011 Scentsy Annual Convention in Ft. Worth, Texas, Heidi Thompson spoke about the Power of One.  Powerful, moving and the spark I needed to begin the journey to get back on course. It would be well worth your time to listen to her talk.
I matter.  I make a difference.  You matter.  You make a difference.

Making a difference starts within ourselves.  If we are way off course, it may take a while to straighten out and get back on course.  There may be bumps and unfortunately bruises we have caused to get where we are.  The most important message is that you, me and most everyone we encounter are Be-You-tiful and the belief that we do make a difference.

I think there must be an understanding that who I make a difference to is not in my control, it is in their control.  I must accept that.  I must ensure that I provide every opportunity to make a difference to someone else and be at peace with the results.  I must attempt to rebuild any bridges that were burnt behind me, but most importantly, focus on the future and not dwell on the past.  Future actions are more important that past conversations.

You are beautiful, believe it and live it.  You do matter to me.

Sidebar:  I grabbed this graphic from Kirk Wiesler's "Thought 4 the Day" blog (http://kirkweisler.com/t4d/) without asking him...  I hope that isn't unethical or wrong, not intended to be.  I strongly recommend you vist Kirk's blog and sign up for his couple a week messages.  Kirk is incredible, inspirational and worth every word you'll read.

For What it's worth Mr. President, December 25th is Christmas

Last year I had 12 Christmas trees

I read a Facebook post that really bothered me, whether it is true or not.  One side of me thinks that is it quite possibly true, I hope not.  The other side of me believes it could be a Christan misrepresentation of what was really said and posted as a sensationalized, political smack of the President...  but again, my gut says it has significant truth to it.  Here's the post:

It was announced that there will not be Christmas trees at the White house this year. They will be called Holiday Trees. Obama says this is no longer a Christian Country, it's a country of many faiths. We as Americans must send the message to Obama that this Country was founded on Christian beliefs and we are STILL a Christian Country. Please repost this and let's stand up for CHRIST

My initial response is simple: Well Mr. President, if that's what you really feel, I'm sorry you are out of touch with the reality.  This is a country founded on Christian beliefs and it is a Christian country.  However, we are also an open and accepting of other faiths and beliefs which allow people of all faiths and beliefs to freely celebrated them.  I will not be forced to do things I do not believe in nor go against what I believe this country was built upon just because someone else may be offended.  Perhaps that person needs to do some soul searching and learn acceptance.  Mr. President, you are wrong.  In my house, I have a Christmas tree.  In my white house, you will also have a Christmas tree, call it what you may, it is still a Christmas tree, you know it and I know it.  On December 25th I will celebrate Christmas with a vast majority of others in the free world and most importantly, with most of the citizens of this country.  Unfortunately, so many have attempted to take Christ so far out of Christmas, it's almost not even a religious discussion anymore!

Christmas is not only celebrated by traditional Christians, but today celebrated my many non-Christan's around the world.  What we do not do (or at least should NOT be doing, is forcing non-believers to celebrate Christmas with us.  Do you think it would be fair to keep you and other non-believers to stay out of the stores during the times they are offering Christmas sales so we can purchase presents and other gifts to share with our loved ones?  No, we are lenient and accepting of all.

Why can't I celebrate Christmas...  We are a nation of acceptance that celebrates many things, in fact, almost everything.  Let's see, in January there's National Bath Safety Month, National Blood Donor Month, National Braille Literacy Month, National Hobby Month, Hot Tea Month, National Oatmeal Month, National Soup Month, American Heart Month, International Boost Self-Esteem Month, International Embroidery Month, Library Lovers Month, National Cherry Month, National Children’s Dental Health Month, National Snack Food Month, and Return Shopping Carts to the Supermarket Month and National Bath Safety Month. 

February brings us to National Black History Month, American Heart Month, Wedding Month, Back For Family Fun Week, International Boost Self-Esteem Month, International Expect Success Month, National Bird Feeding Month, National Caffeine Addiction Awareness Month, National Cherry Month, National Children's Dental Health Month,  National Hot Breakfast Month, National Single and Searching Month, Plant the Seeds of Greatness Month, Publicity for Profit Month, Potato Lover's Month, Return Shopping Carts to the Supermarket Month, Spiritual Teachers Month and Wise Health Care Consumer Month.

In March we celebrate National Nutrition Month, Red Cross Month, Social Worker's Month, Women's History Month, Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month, Umbrella Month, Peanut Month, Noodle Month, Mirth Month, Spring Month, Hoops Madness, Poetry Month, Umbrella Month, Youth Art Month, Academy Awards Month, Ethics Awareness Month, Help Someone See Month, Honor Society Awareness Month, Humorists Are Artists Month, International Listening Awareness Month, International Mirth Month, Irish-American Heritage Month, Music in Our Schools Month, National Collision Awareness Month, National Craft Month, National Kite Month, Optimism Month, Play the Recorder Month, Poison Prevention Awareness Month.

Do I need to go through every month here?  Do I need to come up with a list for the next 9 months?  We celebrate anything and everything.  "Bath Safety Month?"  Come on, give me a break.  Should all those people who don't take a bath be allowed to force us to change what we celebrate and call it "Cleansing Month" or "Stinkless Month"? I hope you get the point.  Christmas Day, without discussing the merits or accuracy of the day, is a day celebrated as a major festival and public holiday in countries around the world, including many whose populations are mostly non-Christian. The rest of the world does not celebrate "Holiday Day", they celebrate "Christmas Day".  In some non-Christian countries, periods of former colonial rule have even introduced the celebration, such as in Hong Kong; in others, Christian minorities or foreign cultural influences have led populations to observe the Christmas. Countries such as Japan and Korea, where Christmas is popular despite there being only a small number of Christians, have adopted many of the secular aspects of Christmas, such as gift-giving, decorations and Christmas trees.

Ah, the Christmas trees, we're at the point where many of us started hearing how opinions, like those that I opened with, began.  Political correctness should perhaps be rethought of as "political acceptance" instead.  When you tell me not to have a Christmas tree because you do are not Christan, aren't you telling me you do not accept and have tolerance to allow me to celebrate my beliefs?  Telling me I can not call the tree in my office that was setup to celebrate Christmas is you forcing your believes on me.  I am not Jewish but I don't call a Menorah a candle holder?  There is only only holiday a Christmas tree was designed to celebrate...  and that's Christmas.  It was never meant to be a holiday tree.

So Mr. President, and others of similar opinion, celebrate what you may, but when that pine tree goes up in my white house, decorated with lights, balls and other festive ornaments...  it's a Christmas Tree in my eyes and always will be. 

This writing was not intended to offend you or anyone else.  If you choose not to celebrate Christmas, I respect that.  If I choose to celebrate Christmas, all I ask is that you in turn, respect that.  I will be celebrating the holidays over the next month or so.  I will go to Christmas parties and will have a Christmas tree (actually several) in my house.  You are welcome to come visit (just give me a call first) and celebrate with me. 

I want my Christmas back.

Still trying...

I've wanted to write for the longest time...  always used the excuse there was not enough time, that's if I even thought about it...  most the time I never even think about it...  just jump from one fire to the next and then the day is over and we do it again.  Speaking of fires... I was working on Scentsy orders (and I do love Scentsy orders), stopped for a minute to put a bagel in the toaster that Travis had brought home for me from Panera (he takes care of his Papa).  Cinnamon Crunch...  they are so good.  Anyway, bagel in the toaster... quick trip to the bathroom while it toast.  When I come out I heard what I thought was water running.  It wasn't, it was the crunch boiling or something in the toaster with flames coming out of the top...  holy crap!

Anyway, fire is out, no damage...  back to the writing.  My friend Phil Gerbyshak was one of the first to encourage me to write...  it might have been Kirk Weisler, but I'll give the credit for this one to Phil because that's when I actually started writing in this and other logs more often.  Thanks Phil!  As you can see from the number of post here, I have not done a very good job at Phil and Becky Robinson 12 Minutes at a Time project, but I'm here trying again. 

Most recently, I have found Matt Cutt's TED presentation (less than 4 minutes) to "Try Something for 30 Days".  Great inspirational message.  Good enough to have be back here again doing what I know I want to do.  Sure wish I could speak like Matt...  maybe that's another thing I need to work on.  I should hurry while there is time.  Why is it we wait so long for what is important to us?

Gotta go practice.

Spread the message, and be one together

A few days ago, I wrote about the message a friend wrote on her blog just a few days before she passed away.  Her message was powerful, inspiring and one of deep love of people and happiness. She wished for all to make this a better world.

Tonight, I learned of the passing of a good friends brother.  I did not know Bjorn's brother, but I could sense what a special person he was through the heartache I felt in Bjorn's messages and post.  Specifically, this post is about the message Bjorn wrote after his brother's passing.  With his permission, I'm sharing it with you.  I hope you are able to take time to reflect and then take action to help make this world a better place to live, while we have the opportunity, one act at a time.

From Bjorn's Facebook post, September 6th....

I have lost my beloved brother…

Through grief and pain, there is joyful remembrance. We were blessed with time for sharing memories, tears, laughs, love, thanks, hugs and goodbyes. Family and friendships, distant and close, connected in ways we could have never imagined…

This morning I enjoyed a most amazing sunrise and sparkling presence in the Rocky Mountain wilderness, and I was one with life... and spirit.

I now take a moment to express my appreciation and love to friends here on FB! Let’s live life well! Let’s love, laugh, do good things, and have a great time together while we can. Look around you and you are sure to find endless opportunity for friendship, synergy and love. In the end, that’s what it’s all about my friend.

Brother and sister, come walk with me. Spread the message, and be one together. Let’s make this incredible world of ours the best it can be!

Thank you!


Swedish:

Jag har förlorat min käre broder…

Genom sorg och smärta, finner jag god ihågkomst. Vi var välsignade med tid för att dela minnen, tårar, skratt, kärlek, tack, kramar och farväl. Familj och vänner, när och fjärran, kopplades samman på sätt som vi aldrig kunnat drömma om...

Denna morgon fick jag uppleva den mest fantastiska soluppgång och sprudlande närvaro i Rocky Mountain vildmark, och jag var ett med liv och ande.

Nu tar jag ett ögonblick att uttrycka min tacksamhet och kärlek till vänner här på FB! Låt oss leva livet väl! Låt oss älska, skratta, göra goda ting, och ha det gott tillsammans medan vi kan. Se dig omkring, och du kommer finna oändliga möjligheter till vänskap, helhet och kärlek. I slutet, så är det just vad det handlar om min gode vän.

Broder och syster, kom gå med mig. Sprid meddelandet, och bli ett tillsammans. Låt oss forma denna vår otroliga värld vi lever i till det bästa den kan vara!

Tack!

I urge you do walk with Bjorn and I; make a concious decision each day to do something different that you might have in the past...  try little random acts of kindness and we'll all be in a better place.

Taking a minute for me... Wow!

I can't remember the last time I just took some time for me. Sitting back, not doing anything special... Drinking coffee (which I could stand to quit drinking) and having a bowl of soup. Not that Panera Bread is a bad place, it's not, but sitting on a deck overlooking a fresh water lake seems like it would be nicer.

The cool thing about being at Panera is many fold. Tyler worked here before leaving for colege... They loved him. He did a great job and was recognized for it many times. He received many Panera bucks while receiving the pats on the back. Since the bucks were only good in the New England stores, dad became the receipent. Tonight, Travis is working... and more or less cooked dinner for me. Using Tyler's Panera bucks, he bought dinner for me. This is the way it should be.

Well, almost, would be better not sitting here alone... but all is good.  Not sure what I like best...  the cherry pasty in the picture or lightly toasted cinnimon crunch bagles with butter....  yuuummmmmmmm.

Heading off into the next chapter...

This has been quite a week..  busy in every aspect.  Tyler has left for college!  Where has the time gone?  Being busy began while car shopping with him.  Typical car shopping experience...  oh come visit us so we can test drive and talk.  What amazed me was the unwillingness of the dealers to negotiate.  In some cases, they had brand new 2011 and 2012 vehicles sitting next to each other and wanted full sticker on both.  Tried telling us there was no difference.  Well Curry; Balise and the others we visited and test drove, you all lost a sale.

Tyler is very happy with his Nissan Versa.  The hardest point for me was him driving out on Saturday morning on his way to college.  Maybe seeing him miss the driveway and drive out across the lawn made me wonder if he had enough driving experience to drive to Georgia!!!  Actually, he drove right up to the front door to load his loot, not unheard of around here to shorten the number of steps we need to take to get to the car.  He's actually on his way to Maryland for a few days with his brother and mother.  Later this week he and his mother will drive to Savannah and get him moved into his new digs for the next 4 years (minus vacation time).  He's wanted to study 3D animation for as long as I can remember.  I always thought he wanted to work on Toy Story 4...  but I guess he really wants to work on new projects.  Best of luck Tyler on reaching for the stars. (Pixar, Disney, Dreamworks - take note of him...  he's good and will need an outstanding job at the end of 4 years to pay off his college mortgage).

Sad Day... Happy Day... Good Ending

Today was one of those days.  Started out on a sad note as I attended Heidi's funeral.  Very touching service... I could only wish so many people would attend my services after my demise. Very emotional messages as one would expect, some crying, some laughter as we celebrated the memory of Heidi.  I thought it was especially touching when a female funeral director came forward to read a message from Heidi's husband David, who is deaf.  I don't think there was a dry eye in the house as even she broke down.

There were emotions in the middle of the day, but completely different.  Frustration, contempt, dismay, wrongdoing, incompetence, fraud, deceitful and a handful of other terms come to mind.  It is hard to be among a group of good people doing what they should be yet be infiltrated with people of the kind I was first thinking.  I hate being a part of that!

Then things turned better.  I hooked up with my son who has been stressing out because I have not been doing the things he has hoped for in the time frame he wanted.  I understand that...  I'm trying to be better.  The important thing is that we jot the job done today and got him a new, well, almost new car.  He was smiling from ear to ear.  We had an appointment with Rosaleen at UMass Five College Federal Credit Union at 4:00... she leaves for the day at 4:30.  After getting hing up at the office, we got there at 4:20.  Bless you Rosaleen for staying late and taking care of things for Tyler.  You are the best.  I know I can say that because she does it time after time... I know from personal experience.  Got to Nicky D's by 5:30 and Tyler paid for his car.  Now he is waiting until tomorrow afternoon...  I hope they had it ready for him.  Tomorrow will be a good day for him!

The day is coming to a close on yet another happy note as we close out the Scentsy Spring/Summer catalog for 2011.  It was nice helping 3 new people get there orders in before the midnight deadline!  WooHoo!  Great month.  Did not quite reach the goal of $2,000 in sales, but tripled the sponsoring goal.  Sales are for today, sponsoring is for life.  I'm happy and the end of the tunnel is getting closer for the next magical ride.  Come join me!

There's A Saying....

John Maxwell once said “People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care.”  I'd like to borrow that concept and say "People won't know how much you love them until you show them how much you care."  Life is too short for all the drama; focus on what matters and be in as much happiness as possible each and every day of our life.  Hopefully they will accept us for who we are.

The lady pictured in this post is someone I'd like to consider as a friend, probably an acquaintance at best... the mom of one of my son's former hockey teammates, is who I wrote about a few days ago that gave me a wake up call. Early yesterday morning, August 28th,  Heidi's courageous battle with cancer came to an end.  As she wished, she was at home with those she loved.  Heidi found Caring Bridge a comforting way to communicate with all of us who called her a friend.  I was not really close personal friends with Heidi or her husband David or their children for that matter"; we were just hockey parents with a common interest between us. 

What Heidi shared with and reminded us of over the past few years is how important life, family and friends really are.  How positive whe was during her entire battle. We are all different people and all have different likes, wants and desires...  what Heidi reminded me to do is not to wait until it is too late to share those precious thoughts with those you love and care about, whether or not it is returned... it is how life should be. I only hope I could be that person.

Rest in Peace Heidi...  you have some good company up there... too many to name.

Tequila and Salt - Reality Check Follow-up

My last post was probably depressing and maybe did not paint a pretty of me...  you might have thought, damn, no wonder he is alone and sad!  This post is the outside layer of me doing what is right to motivate and help others feel better.  I don't know who the original author is, it was not me.  I apss this along to anyone else out there that needs to understand.

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day.

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone,even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. You are special and unique.
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
10.  When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

Those that know me understand that I try to make a joke of everything.... so, in the spirit of being me, consider the following:

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
   Who the hell would do that and WHY for me???  You can be done with me!!!
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
   It's the "some way" that concerns me.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
   LOL, more than one Dan in the world... OMG!
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
   Well good for them
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. 
   Hmmm, nightmare or something better???
6. You mean the world to someone. 
   Obviously they don't know me well enough yet...  but it is a nice thought that I really could mean the world to someone, for better or worse, richer or poorer yada, yada
7. You are special and unique.
   Oh, I am unique
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. 
   Again, LOL, tell me who!
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
   That "is" how I try to look at everything... gets you through the day.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look. 
    I'm tryin
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
    So true, easier said than done...  we are a people that thrive on negatives.  Remember Rule #6

Dan's out

Another Reality Check... unfortunately

It was three years ago this past week that I lost my dad. I think that has been one of the most significant times in my life... an event that aches at my heart even today.  I changed because of it, which is not good, because the change I feel is eating me up inside.  The loss of my dad followed the loss of friends like Mike...  much younger than my dad, who lost his battle with cancer and the loss of one of my most beloved co-workers, Mary.  I remember the day she came to me and told me she planned on retiring in a year so I had a year to find a new Security Manager to replace her (she was not replaceable as a person).  A month later we cried in my office when she returned from a doctors visit and told me she had just been diagnosed with cancer... then I remember the day several months later I put her on a plane back to Boseman to be with her mom and the sparkle of her eye, grandson Max.  She died a week later.

As much as I try, I am devastated by the loses in my life... death is the ultimate loss.  However, loses whether at the hands of death, divorce, separation or being transferred around the county are taking their toll on me.  I've had my fill.  I work hard to smile...  to do good... to do what is necessary.... but I have lost energy, I'm running out of the ability to remain positive.  I am alone.

Today, I have just read a message from yet another friend who has been in full battle mode since 2009.  She writes on her blog at CaringBridge:

"Very sad news yesterday. My sister in law lost her battle with cancer. She has been very very sick. MY love goes out to my brother and the boys..


It also brings us to not such good news or me either.. I am know receiveing blood and platlet infusion 3 times a week. This is all the is keeping me alive. The doctor are giving me just a couple of weeks then they are going to suggest I stop receiving the treatment. I rarely get out of bed. Only sit up with the kids are a few hours is lucky then I am back in bed. Barely eat anyhting, At least I haven't vomited in a few days and the fever, rigors, sweats and exhaustion are setting in. That's why I haveN't written It is a real chore to come into the basement to use the computer. My vision is reallly blurry. And I can't reallly see what I am typing.

So because I have no idea when something could happen I want to let everyone know just how much I love you. I have been trying to find some majic words to write to all of you but I don't have them. I am scared, really sick, frustrated and at my emotional end.

Each and everyone of you has meant something special to me.Please remember me with a big smile, hearty laugh and open arms.


Live well, love more. Thank you for loving me and all your support during my battle."

How can I complain, this wonderful mother has acknowledged she is about to pay the ultimate price.
 
Life is too short.  Life can be happy, life can be sad.  There is no reason to be alone and sad.

Connecticut Welcomes You - to the Landfill?

 I had the pleasure of driving home to Massachusetts Sunday night via I-95 northbound out of New York City, a route I almost never ever take because of high possibility of getting stuck in traffic on the George Washington Bridge.  I normally would go north to I-87/287 to cross the Hudson on the Tappan Zee Bridge into White Plains, NY.  I now have a second reason not to take the I-95 route....  it is like a traveling though a landfill.  Garbage, trash, run down areas...  terrible roads and it extends right into Connecticut.

This is not a bash of Connecticut per se...  it could be about similar locations in any state.  It is a bash of how we as citizens have contributed to the mess.  It's a bash of the owners of properties, such as the ones pictured here, to not take the responsibility to clean them up.  It's a bash of people for throwing their trash on the ground... or feeling they are allowed to place their stickers and signs on the property of others.

I stopped at this Norwalk, CT rest area on I-95.  I presume it is owned by the State of Connecticut (shame on you) and leased to businesses, such as McDonalds (sort of shame on you...  I will say, the McDonalds area was the cleanest at this entire rest stop).  The parking lot is a trash can without the can.  Litter everywhere... in the parking lot, in the bushes, on the little patches of grass.  Welcome to Connecticut.

I thought the light post in the parking lots were interesting.  Hundreds of stickers of posters, signs and stickers... that's normally the first place I think of going to look for the best rates for a new home mortgage or for the ultimate weight loss solution.  What would make ANYONE think that posting their sign would be seen, let alone followed up on by anyone?!!! By the way, I made up the mortgage and weight loss thing, the spot where I took this picture from is as close to post I got.















Lastly, I thought it funny how I found a comment box tucked away behind a plant inside.  "How are we doing?" to sign ask.  There's a box to deposit your selections.... a pen to write them... but nothing to write on.  Do you suppose so many people were so disgusted, as I was, they already used all the comment forms?  I'm guessing this box has not been checked in years.  In case you can't read it, you can visit their Web site at: http://ctserviceplazas.com (does not appear to be a State of Connecticut page....  does that mean it is privately run and just designed to make you think it has something to do with the state?) or you can e-mail your comments to: comments@ctserviceplazas.com (1-888-406-3466).  If I were from Connecticut, I'd call or write them.

Does the Justice System Work?

This week we again saw what many feel was tragedy in our American court rooms.  Caylee Anthony, pictured here, was found dead about six months after she was finally reported missing. Her mother, Casey Anthony was acquitted of first degree murder charges levied against her.  Most people are appalled and flabbergasted.  Most people, but not the jury of her peers.  It seems sad, but I too think she got away with murder.

This is not the first time we feel our courts have failed us.  The O.J. Simpson trial was the most recent other alleged failing of the court system.  People were appalled and flabbergasted then as well.

I don't even know why I am writing this because I personally am so frustrated with the court system for personal reasons that could be a blog all of it's own.  I think the problem is that the court system is a system of no accountability.  None for the judges, none for the lawyers.  They could do what they choose almost without reprisal.  I don't buy the argument that it is a defense attorney's job to get someone off...  I think it is there responsibility to ensure a fair trail, but not at the cost of technicalities.

On the other hand, it is better than some of the options.

Volunteers for the Good

Last month, tornadoes came home to us in Massachusetts.  I have been amazed with the devastation and destruction.  I have been even more amazed at the out pouring of help of good people in the surrounding areas.  Story after story of people giving of themselves to help those that need it.  I know a few names, but they are only a few and they know who they are.  My hat is off to each and every one of you folks.  You are what we as a society are all about.  Thank you.

I've been lucky for most of my life in that I have never had to endure a natural disaster of the magnitude that destroyed people and property around me.  Most of the time, the closest I have been is to see what's happened via the news on television.  I do remember once on a flight to the west coast, flying over an amazingly hugh flood area where the Mississippi had gone over the top.

On the return part of a college trip with my son Tyler to Savannah, GA, we decided to stop early for the night in South Carolina.  Someone said, good thing you stopped, there are suppose to be tornadoes in North Carolina tonight.  Weatherman, who listens to them?  Well there were tornadoes in North Carolina in which several people lost their lives.  Driving up I-95, we drove through an area that had been hit and saw where, what appeared to be, a mobile home park.  All that was left was "stuff" everywhere, and I mean everywhere.  We saw people working on and going through the mess.  We felt the "wow" of it.

This particular post is about the Chain Saw Response Team that came to the aid of Monson, MA.  Kudos to you.  The pictures don't come close to telling the real story, but for those that are not here, it's a story.  Look -> here.  I am trying hard not to slam those that showed up and charged astronomical fees for their help, but I can't help it.  Just because you got to people that were over a barrel.  Screw you, what goes around, comes around.

Thank you Chainsaw response Team; Belchertown Helps Monson and ALL the others I don't even know about. I urge you, and you children, that if and when the need every arises, go volunteer, for something, for anything. Teach a value so that we may all take the time to help where help is really needed.

I Wonder.... Does it Always Have to Be Fair?

Reading today's online version of USA Today of the New York vote on gay marriage (http://usat.ly/iwXggz) got me thinking. First, let me say that this writing is not about gay marriage itself, it is about the concept of, does it always have to be fair? By that, I mean, does everything have to be fair?

I was provoked into thought be the articles statement "The trend seems undeniable, rooted in the American belief - and Constitutional guarantee - that everyone deserves equal treatment under the law". Let's get beyond the gay marriage debate or conversation and not even discuss my support or opposition for it. Let's think about what's fair and what's not; what's reasonable and what's not.

I wonder....
? if a girl should be able to join little league or boy scouts?
? if a boy should be able to join girl scouts or brownies?
? if the Professional Golf Associationshould be forced to change it's rules to allow a player to ride in a cart?
? why must we have both men's rooms and women's bathrooms?
? if it is fair that a basketball hoop is so high, should it be lowered so height challenged people can play?
? if it is fair actors and professional athletes get paid more than teachers or fireman do?
? if it is fair that insurance companies take our premiums and can also deny procedures our doctors prescribe?
? if it is fair only girls can join a sorority and boys can only join fraternities?
? if schools are controlled by the laws, why kids of any faith can't say a prayer, but the president can end every address with "God bless the United States of America"?
? if I can't have a Christmas Tree in my office if it is fair those against it get A vacation day for Christmas or get to participate in my Christmas sales (and it is a Christmas Tree, not a holiday tree)?
? if I can celebrate Black History Month, would it be also OK to celebrate White Human month as well?
? if it is fair kids with average grades get fewer scholarships and don't have the same options of those with higher grades (or more money)?
? if it is fair the president gets helicopter rides to the airport and I have to sit in rush hour traffic?
? if it is fair women's shoes are less expensive than men's shoes?
? why it is fair for me to open a business and be told My customers and me can't smoke in it if I want to allow it?
? is it fair that some people are hurt in accidents or struck with an illness when they have lived what appears to be the perfect life and others (I'll refrain from adjectives unbecoming of niceness) who seemingly have done nothing right... don't?
? why we always have to find fault instead of finding good?
? why we need hot water heaters, wouldn't cold water heaters make more sense?
? if any of this matters to you?

Oh, I could go on.... Life is certainly not always fair.
Please leave your thoughts, if you wonder why...

How bad is your job... really?

Words are not necessary if this is your job...  if not, be thankful you have one

Why is being illogical so easy for some people?

I know not everyone wants to be a doctor, a truck driver, a garbage collector, an office worker or any of thousands of other jobs.  What I don't understand is why and how some people justify the mediocre jobs they have because they don't have time. They don't have time to do something better.

Talking to a young gal tonight who was counting her tips. She's young, works at an ice cream stand or something like that.  She was happy she made about $16.00 per hour in tips.  That was a great day.  I mentioned she might want to look into something where she could potentially earn a lot more.  Another Scentsy Consultant was here and told about a basket party she just did.  Basket parties are where we make up a basket of samples for the host to use for show and tell as she talks to her friends, relatives and coworkers to assist with sales.  This basket party netted something over $600.00 in sales; the host received almost $100.00 in free product and the consultant made more than $150.00 for what she estimated at a maximum of 3 hours of work.

I don't have time... I have this to do...  I have that to do... Oh, how frustrating it is to me.  Now, I understand that everyone doesn't want to be a Scentsy Independent Consultant or a Mary Kay Representative or even look for a better job.  Why???

This reminds me of a story I hear Art Williams tell.  If you don't know who Art Williams is, he was the founding forefather of A.L.Williams.  A company that, in my words, prided themselves not is selling people life insurance,  but finding people who had brought themselves Whole Life, Universal Life or something other than term insurance and showed them how they could do better every single time, without exception.  He told about how he would show people where they could get twice as much insurance for half the price; and then recommended they invest what they saved....  and some people were so....  so illogical, they just didn't get it.  That frustrated Art to no end.  I am right there feeling the same way.

However, Art conquered the frustration and went on to become a multimillionaire.  I haven't gotten over it yet.  Art got over it by saying to himself... no matter how bad a deal the person had; no matter how much they could have saved in premium and in with their investments; no matter how bad it is...  if they are that illogical, it is the best thing they could have....  well good for them.  That's what I have to do, get to that mindset.  Once there, I'll be off and running, how about you?

What's wrong with some people?

I almost hate to write this today since it follows my previous post...  something good....  something not so good.  It should be hard to figure out which is which.  What's wrong with people today?  Why are there so many that feel they have to be "who they are" in the midst of those of us that don't care who they are if they are going to dress and act as they do?  Am I being intolerant? While I don't mean to offend anyone, I likely will, but I feel I am being offended and also have a right to speak up.

There are just some things that a majority in society do not agree with and do not have to accept.  Maybe someone could build a mall where your pants have to be lower than the cheeks of your butt in order to shop there.  Those of us that wear our pants as they should be would not be allowed (as if we would be interested in the first place).

Now that I think of it, someone has done just that...  I'm not sure how it was originally planned, but Sam Walton's empire has become just that.  If there's any doubt and haven't seen it before, the clientele is well documented at the People of WalMart (see www.peoplpeofwalmart.com).  If they installed bars around the various departments, it would be like going to a zoo.  Why don't these folks get it?  I think it's an easy answer... they don't care.  So sad.

Buddies of Hope

Giving Back is one of the most important thing we can do as Scentsy Consultants, as leaders, and just as people. Giving More Than You Take is embedded into the ethos of Scentsy and everything we do as Consultants! We are all so blessed and when we look at all of the tragedies around us, we should hugs our kids tight, kiss our loved ones, and appreciate all that we have and how quickly and easily it can all be taken away from us without a moments notice ......by a natural disaster, by an accident, an illness or in many other ways!

Buddies of Hope came about when deadly tornadoes ripped through Tuscaloosa, Alabama in late April 2011 and was the brain child of Scentsy Director, Kara Laczynski. Although I have not yet personally met Kara, we have conversed about the incredible program she has begun for the sake of children who's lives have been turned upside down. We both agree and want this to be for all children in need after a horrific ordeal has happened to them.

As you all know there have been horrible tornadoes all over the Midwest, South, Southeast, and Northeast the past few weeks and months. Many lives have been lost and entire communities have been demolished! The loss is great and the impact on children in these communities is unimaginable! Some have lost parents, some have lost homes, some have lost their schools, their communities, and their friends. Some have lost all of the above and more!

As a Scentsy Consultant I am always completely overwhelmed by the generosity and compassion of other Scentsy consultants and our incredible customers. We're all always looking for ways to make things easier, lessen the pain and burden, and put a smile on the faces of others. Buddies of Hope has spread nationally, buddies are being delivered to children all across the country. This program gives Scentsy Buddies to the children who have been impacted by these natural disasters and who have suffered great loss! There are lots of children impacted and they NEED MORE BUDDIES! So...we're calling all consultants, customers and businesses to come to their rescue, collectively participate, and share our own Scentsy love with the children in need!

For those that are not Scentsy consultants:
ALL Consultant commissions from the sale of these buddies goes to purchase more buddies. WE NEED YOUR HELP! Buddies are $25 each and there are 6 to choose from. You can see them on my website at https://dangreeley.scentsy.us/Buy/Col... or the Web site of any other Scentsy consultant that supports this cause. Those supporting this cause have pledged to donate all profits from the sale of Buddies back to Buddies of Hope... we are here for the children only. Please contact Kara or me directly if you can help. TO ORDER: Please go to the Web page above and order or call my office at 413-203-4930 (and save shipping cost) and order directly from us.

If you order on line, ship buddies to:

Buddies of Hope New England
141 Oakridge Drive
Belchertown, MA 01007

or

Buddies of Hope Tuscaloosa
‎8915 Argonne Forest Drive
Duncanville, AL 35456

If you are a consultant
Order through your own workstation, list Buddies of Hope New England or Buddies of Hope Tuscaloosa as the party host and ship buddies to one of the addresses above. Call my office for the Buddies of Hope donor card that you and or your customers can complete (or e-mail us the information for the card to buddiesofhope@gmail.com, we'll add it. Every buddy will include a donor card of who the buddy came from.

It may not seem like much to you, but it could mean the world to that little boy or girl!

Please join, support and promote our cause on Facebook: http://bit.ly/joTU2A

Unhappy and am Posting Anyway

I'm writing only because of the commitment to write everyday, what I'm feeling, what I'm thinking or what I'm doing....  all in under 12 minutes.  I also don't lie complainers and whiners or those that are always right...  I hope I don't fall into any of those categories too often.  Unfortunately I know I have and I'm trying to stay out of that area.

Today I feel like my hands are tied...  I'm caught, I don't know which way to turn...  I, for once, am having a great deal of difficulty with a decision that is stressing me to a point where I don't want to be.  Don't you hate it when you feel lie that?  What do you do?

It's said that you can only control the things you can control and not those you can not.  Easier said than done when there are things that mean so much for which you have no control.  Life is too short to have to be in these situations. 

I will survive.

A Day With the Boys

Yesterday (almost Father's Day), I got to spend the day with my youngest son Travis and my two sons-in-law, Garrett and Pockey.  I'm not sure "sons-in-law" is a correct phrase, it sound weird.  Garrett and Pockey are both golfers; Travis is a 16 year old natural for someone that really does not play regularly...  he has a lot to learn and could probably become very good with some coaching and practice.  Me, I play once or twice a year at events hosted where I work as "golf events", but are more of a take the afternoon off and let's relax and have fun.  Relax and golf - that could be an oxymoron.

We played at Ledges in South Hadley, MA, the first time there for any of us.  They said the course was on the short side so we played the blue tees.  To me, all courses are long whether we play red, white, blue  or gold.  Typical day on the course for me...  hit the first ball a country mile, the next one about a foot as it popped straight up in the air, then another OK shot followed by woods, rough, bunkers and lots of two and three putting.  Of course, I wanted to make a better showing, but it really didn't matter, I got to spend time with a few of the boys that normally doesn't happen.

I think if I were to flash back 10 or 15 years, yet being able to be in the same place I am today, I would have a closer relationship with the boys and would be able to hang out with them (and keep up with them).  I know things change, I know I have, I often wish I could do all I use to do.

Although I don't think we took any pictures yesterday to look back on, I'll always have what I can remember about the day (like how the two big boys wanted to humble the little one for how they played last time - I think Travis played pretty well last time - he cam on stronger yesterday toward the end).  Thanks guys... but next time, please have a masseuse ready for my feet... I know I had a cart to ride in, but my feet still hurt.

Father's Day morning - Travis comes down at 10:30 and is making me coffee and toast.  Sweet.

My first 12 minute (maximum) post

I'm taking the challenge of long time friend Phil Gerbyshak (@PhilGerb on twitter) and new time friend Becky Robinson (@beckyrbnsn) and their 12 Minutes at a time project (@12minuteSMP).  Here goes my story today.

Yesterday was a bitter sweet day... some sad thoughts for happy moments, some thought for how the moments will make me sad.  First, my second born daughter organized an awesome 40th birthday dinner for my first born.  It was nice, it was fun and it was a surprise!  Well done Becca, Happy Birthday Tina.  At least it was all good until, during a conversation of kids and birthday's, Tina mentions it must be an awful feeling when you child turns 40!  One must really feel old at that point.  Oh sure, rub it in honey.  At least I'm not as old as your mother (she should love that one but it eases my pain).  The pictures should be interesting, especially the ones in our baloon hats.

The second part of this story is that on the way to the joyous event, my Beemer reached a milestone...  we turned 100,000 miles...  gosh they go quick when you drive 40,000 miles a year or more.  100,000 miles.  This is the best car I have ever owned, and I have had some cars that were pretty nice... there was the Buick Park Ave back in the day....  the Volvo S80 T6...  sweet and powerful....  but this BMW 550i is stands up its calling as the ultimate driving machine.  I love the way I get a hug from the seats, literally, every time I get in.  The best thing is that it looks and acts new... it just has 100,000 miles on it now.  People find it hard to believe it is not brand new, that's what happened when it is taken care of (that sounds like a subject for another time).  100,000 miles means a few more things... the warranty expired... no more included oil changes and wiper blades...  included maintenance is gone....  oh well, it's still the best car I ever owned.

Continuing Resolutions....

Next window please, it's not my job

I don't understand the "in the weeds" part of the federal budget, but I sure got a dose of the bureaucracy the last few days watching CNN Live.  Both the Senate and the House...  pointing fingers at who's fault it was that we were operating for 6 months into the fiscal year without a budget to operate the business with. 

That may be exactly why I don't understand.... I said "business" and should have said "government".  I forgot the fact that we do not operate as if we were a business, we operate as if we are a government.  Thus, we spend much more than we take in, we don't and can't make a profit...  we operate slowly, using last year or last decades mentality, after all , that's the way we always ran it, why change?

The only good thing I saw happen tonight was that Congress finally came together at the literal eleventh hour and reached a deal.  Day after day, pointing fingers, making accusations and to come together and be so stomach wrenching god awful thanking the other side for working with them to make this work.  gag me with a spoon.  I just don't understand how the fed can step in and block strikes or work stoppages because of the potential impact on the economy or the lives of American people.  In 1997, the Clinton administration blocked a potential strike at American Airlines and cited the huge impact a strike would have had on the economy and on Americans' travel plans, yet they were willing to shutdown over 800,000 of their own.  Any effect on the economy there?  Different strokes for different folks I guess.

Who are the winners?  All those thousands of Americans who's lives would have been turned upside down by a government shutdown.  At some level, we all live pay check to pay check, missing a check would have been a killer for some.  The military spouses that live on the edge taking care of business while their loved one fights for their lives and our freedom...  loss of a check would have been unconscionable.

Thanks Congress, not so you can pat yourselves on the back for being 6 months late with doing what you were put there to do...  thanks for taking care of those that put you there (and those that can take you out of there).

As a final thought that can prevent this constant fiscal disaster....  make Continuing Resolutions (CR) automatic.  If congress does not have an approved budget in place by a certain date, the CR automatically goes into effect and remains in effect until congress has an approved budget.  Let stress, less wasted time....  there I go being logical again.