Sunday, August 28, 2011

There's A Saying....

John Maxwell once said “People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care.”  I'd like to borrow that concept and say "People won't know how much you love them until you show them how much you care."  Life is too short for all the drama; focus on what matters and be in as much happiness as possible each and every day of our life.  Hopefully they will accept us for who we are.

The lady pictured in this post is someone I'd like to consider as a friend, probably an acquaintance at best... the mom of one of my son's former hockey teammates, is who I wrote about a few days ago that gave me a wake up call. Early yesterday morning, August 28th,  Heidi's courageous battle with cancer came to an end.  As she wished, she was at home with those she loved.  Heidi found Caring Bridge a comforting way to communicate with all of us who called her a friend.  I was not really close personal friends with Heidi or her husband David or their children for that matter"; we were just hockey parents with a common interest between us. 

What Heidi shared with and reminded us of over the past few years is how important life, family and friends really are.  How positive whe was during her entire battle. We are all different people and all have different likes, wants and desires...  what Heidi reminded me to do is not to wait until it is too late to share those precious thoughts with those you love and care about, whether or not it is returned... it is how life should be. I only hope I could be that person.

Rest in Peace Heidi...  you have some good company up there... too many to name.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Tequila and Salt - Reality Check Follow-up

My last post was probably depressing and maybe did not paint a pretty of me...  you might have thought, damn, no wonder he is alone and sad!  This post is the outside layer of me doing what is right to motivate and help others feel better.  I don't know who the original author is, it was not me.  I apss this along to anyone else out there that needs to understand.

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day.
  1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
  2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
  3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
  4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone,even if they don't like you.
  5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
  6. You mean the world to someone.
  7. You are special and unique.
  8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
  9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
  10.  When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.
  11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
Those that know me understand that I try to make a joke of everything.... so, in the spirit of being me, consider the following:
  1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
    Who the hell would do that and WHY for me???  You can be done with me!!!
  2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
    It's the "some way" that concerns me.
  3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
    LOL, more than one Dan in the world... OMG!
  4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
    Well good for them
  5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. 
    Hmmm, nightmare or something better???
  6. You mean the world to someone. 
    Obviously they don't know me well enough yet...  but it is a nice thought that I really could mean the world to someone, for better or worse, richer or poorer yada, yada
  7. You are special and unique.
    Oh, I am unique
  8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. 
    Again, LOL, tell me who!
  9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
    That "is" how I try to look at everything... gets you through the day.
  10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look. 
    I'm tryin
  11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
    So true, easier said than done...  we are a people that thrive on negatives.  Remember Rule #6
Dan's out

Another Reality Check... unfortunately

It was three years ago this past week that I lost my dad. I think that has been one of the most significant times in my life... an event that aches at my heart even today.  I changed because of it, which is not good, because the change I feel is eating me up inside.  The loss of my dad followed the loss of friends like Mike...  much younger than my dad, who lost his battle with cancer and the loss of one of my most beloved co-workers, Mary.  I remember the day she came to me and told me she planned on retiring in a year so I had a year to find a new Security Manager to replace her (she was not replaceable as a person).  A month later we cried in my office when she returned from a doctors visit and told me she had just been diagnosed with cancer... then I remember the day several months later I put her on a plane back to Boseman to be with her mom and the sparkle of her eye, grandson Max.  She died a week later.

As much as I try, I am devastated by the loses in my life... death is the ultimate loss.  However, loses whether at the hands of death, divorce, separation or being transferred around the county are taking their toll on me.  I've had my fill.  I work hard to smile...  to do good... to do what is necessary.... but I have lost energy, I'm running out of the ability to remain positive.  I am alone.

Today, I have just read a message from yet another friend who has been in full battle mode since 2009.  She writes on her blog at CaringBridge:

"Very sad news yesterday. My sister in law lost her battle with cancer. She has been very very sick. MY love goes out to my brother and the boys..


It also brings us to not such good news or me either.. I am know receiveing blood and platlet infusion 3 times a week. This is all the is keeping me alive. The doctor are giving me just a couple of weeks then they are going to suggest I stop receiving the treatment. I rarely get out of bed. Only sit up with the kids are a few hours is lucky then I am back in bed. Barely eat anyhting, At least I haven't vomited in a few days and the fever, rigors, sweats and exhaustion are setting in. That's why I haveN't written It is a real chore to come into the basement to use the computer. My vision is reallly blurry. And I can't reallly see what I am typing.

So because I have no idea when something could happen I want to let everyone know just how much I love you. I have been trying to find some majic words to write to all of you but I don't have them. I am scared, really sick, frustrated and at my emotional end.

Each and everyone of you has meant something special to me.Please remember me with a big smile, hearty laugh and open arms.


Live well, love more. Thank you for loving me and all your support during my battle."

How can I complain, this wonderful mother has acknowledged she is about to pay the ultimate price.
 
Life is too short.  Life can be happy, life can be sad.  There is no reason to be alone and sad.